Saturday, 8 November 2014

The Key to a Happy Relationship?

I heard a snippet on the radio the other week from a couple celebrating their 70th wedding anniversary (can't remember exactly the number of years, but it was a lot!). They said that they key to their successful marriage was arguing.

R & I are yet to have an argument, or even a disagreement for that matter. Not sure if that's a good or a bad sign!

In a relationship where there isn't even a heated conversation, it apparently could be that one or both parties don't feel safe enough to express themselves. I totally understand that, and I can appreciate that you may be in a relationship where it's difficult to be honest. Thankfully though this doesn't apply to me now (& I hope it doesn't apply to R either!).

I'm not a confrontational person and think I'm generally quite laid back. I'd say I'm open and honest with everyone that crosses my path. And R is laid back too. So perhaps that's why we've not had any fights - it's against our individual personalities.

We've been in a couple of stressful situations, like when we got locked out of the house, and I had thought if we were going to argue that'd be when it would have happened. But it didn't. We managed to keep calm, organised a lock smith to come out to the house & even went for an ice cream whilst we waited! (R had to go & get the ice cream as I was in my nightshirt...oops!). Now we look back on it & have a laugh. How on earth did we manage to both leave without keys :-/

And I think moving forward that we may potentially have (hopefully small) bumps in the road as we try to blend our lives together (more on this another time I think, but suffice to say things are going well!). I am confident that we will be able to have rational discussions without the need to argue. It's definitely good to talk. This is one of the lessons I learned from my past.

One other thing I have learned is not to bottle things up and let resentment and anger set in - everything will be blown out of proportion. It's best to raise your issue early. It's also important to listen. There are two sides to every story.

So tell me, what are your thoughts - is it really healthy for a relationship to be arguing all the time? 

1 comment:

  1. I don't think it's healthy to be what you are not in a relationship. So if you are not a fighter then it is ideal that you have met a like-minded soul. One size never fits all


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